5 Reasons why the UK isn’t sh*t…


Pic: Asphalt & Rubber

Plagued with obesity and cheating benefit scummers, run by James Blunts and fraudsters, and a distinct lack of cornering nirvana, the UK isn’t that bad after all. Here are just five reasons why…


1 – Extendabenda exhausts in Japan

Ducati’s Panigale range is a thing of beauty, although ruined in Japan due to emission laws and noise restrictions with what looks like a 1980’s Micron exhaust to please neighbours. Check out the dummy underslung exit on this 899. Nice.


2 – In Switzerland, riding your motorcycle on a track is forbidden

I mean, come on: how idiotic and reckless is stretching the legs of your 200bhp motorcycle on a circuit? Since 1958, the H&S-heavy Swiss government banned all motorcycle racing. To make matters worse, you can’t even ride your bike on a trackday. These radical Swiss thrill-seekers have to cross the border.


3 – Motors and pedals mix it up in Sweden

Among the barrage of cycle paths in Sweden, mopeds are allowed to rip-it-oop with actual pedal cyclists, STDs SPDs and all. Imagine the road rage in the UK? It’d be civil war, I tell thee. The Scandinavians are a friendly bunch though.


4 – You can buy a bike licence in Kuwait, so long as your face fits

L-plates, CBT, A1/A2 licences, a shit-load of money and years of training? Not in Kuwait, or many other Middle-East countries for that matter. While living out there, a mate of ours was offered a bike licence, without training or examination at an obvious cost. Rather them than us given the road etiquette.


5- The French still insist on the 100bhp limit

Since 1985, all motorcyclists in France have been buggered by a 100bhp limit – and all while having to carry a breathalyser in your pocket, adding more unwanted mass. That means your €20,000 BMW is the same power as a €1,000 600cc shitter. Of course, not all residents follow the strict laws and the limit is due to be lifted. Shrug shoulders, ‘Je ne sais pas’…


Know of anymore stupidity? Let us know


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